"We wait in hope for the Lord; he is our help and our shield. In him our hearts rejoice, for we trust in his holy name. May your unfailing love rest upon us, O Lord, even as we put our hope in you." Psalm 33:20-22
This week has been one of those really hard ones where all the areas of struggle, pain, and fear in my life overlapped and overwhelmed me. It was like a perfect storm of things past, present, and future and I allowed it to get the best of me. But I am always amazed that it is in the midst of the mess when I cry out to God and say I don't know what to do that he reminds me of who he is. Several times this week I have been reminded of the greatness of God.
I just finished reading a book called Kisses from Katie this week. It is about a girl who decided to go to Uganda for a year and is now in the process of adopting 13 girls, runs a non-profit that allows over 200 kids to go to school, and reaches out to the community around her. As I read her stories, over and over again she pointed out how God does the impossible when we follow his call to love with abandon. One part in particular stood out to me. Someone told her in response to the amazing things God was doing that she was one of God's favorites. She agreed but reminded her readers we all are. It's easy to read this kind of book and say this is an exception but it's not. God looks at us and sees his favorite. He looks at the person who hurt me and sees his favorite. He looks at the person who is hurting and sees his favorite. If we live in this knowledge how can we not expect great things in our own lives and also in the lives of the people we are trying to forgive.
This morning I read Psalm 33 because it's the 3rd day of February and I can't just keep reading the first 31 psalms over and over! I'm going to be honest, I kind of skimmed those last three verses at first but when I realized I hadn't actually read them, I stopped and made myself concentrate and read it again. And then again. And again. And one more time. And it hit me hard. "We wait in hope for the Lord; he is our help and our shield." In the midst of the process of forgiveness and healing of deep hurt, I wait in hope for the Lord. In the midst of financial insecurity, I wait in hope for the Lord. In the midst of trying to do something that seems beyond my capacity, I wait in hope for the Lord. It is good to be reminded that there is a lot of waiting involved. The problems aren't solved and the whole plan is not revealed but it is because of the unfailing love of God that I can wait in hope.
On a lighter note, I have failed at reading three books a week and we haven't consistently exercised every day but we have successfully made a meal from a different country! The important things in life :) And I have to say, I'm totally in love with the people in my life. Is that weird to say? But I truly am. I mean, for starters, I had the most amazing 30th birthday party. Pin the dentures on granny bon bon was played, enough said! I'm just so glad I get to do life, the good and the bad, with these people.
Until next time!
